i'm feeling like myself again, which isn't a surprise since my period started yesterday. Hopefully my doctor will have a good solution by the time next month rolls around. i'm very much tired of the highs and lows that i get while going through PMDD. But at least everyone around knows my situation with it, so it doesn't seem like i'm just making it all up when i speak to my doctor. i don't know if she'll really believe me at first, but i hope so.
It's strange, though, because i almost feel like two different people sharing the same body. It's not like DID, though; i'm completely aware of what i'm doing and what's going on, i'm just powerless to stop the more dramatic actions. There are also no periods of blackouts, so it's not really like DID at all. But when i'm going through PMDD, i'm not Lilikka as i envision her. Or, rather, as i envision myself in my own mind. i'm more like the teenage version of myself, awkward and angry and definitely not who i'd like to be.
i think i shall be going to bed soon, though. i need a good amount of sleep to catch up on, plus i resume my meetings again tomorrow.