This morning, while reading over some threads on a site i visit often, i thought about some old friends i used to have. They were nice people and i would still like to be friends, but our different views on kink and healthy relationships have torn down the friendship and we don't really talk anymore.
Basically, what i think it all boiled down to was a case of "my kink is better than your kink." i say this because these particular friends are into swinging. And that, for some reason, is "healthier" than BDSM. Personally, i feel that both types of kinks can be healthy as long as all parties in the relationship are happy with it.
But that's not how he felt about it (she's another story). i can understand that he's a friend and cares for me, especially since he knew about the failures of my previous relationship (which wasn't BDSM flavored) and the abuse i suffered. But what i don't think that he realizes is that Master isn't the kind of person to ever abuse anyone, let alone someone he loves and cares for.
So in the end, it came down to him saying that BDSM encourages the abuse of women, but swinging is ok because all parties are happy in the arrangement. i guess it's really just a matter of ignorance on the subject on his part. Either way, it's a bit silly to try and claim one kink is better or worse than another.