Friday, February 6, 2009

Alone Again

Again, i find myself without Master for the night. i never know what to do with myself. Before he leaves for the evening, i feel as if i can handle it, only to find, in the middle of him being gone, that i can't. i don't know why this is. i suppose it can be traced back to all my attachment and abandonment issues. i know he's not really abandoning me, but i feel so lost and all alone without him.

Mostly, i hate feeling this way. i think it's shitty of me, and it's shittier of me to actually tell him. But we put honesty in our relationship above most other things, including, sometimes, the feelings of others. Even still, i'm not sure if i should write this here, because i know he'll read it and i don't want him feeling bad about something that's my issue.

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