When this journey with Master first began, i was so sure it was going to result in a loss of "self." At the very least, i questioned it and wasn't sure if i wanted that or didn't want that. My personal identity had never had too much of an impact on those around me, or no real impact that i could tell, so it wasn't something that i really thought about too much. So, for the most part, it wasn't a truly big loss if i didn't have a sense of self.
But it obviously bothered some part of me, because the idea of losing it scared me. And i was so afraid that by consenting to be Master's pet, i was going to lose that last bit that made up me. i never let it deter me from what i wanted with Master and, really, i'm glad i didn't. Because being Master's pet has actually had a completely opposite effect than i had ever suspected. Instead of losing myself, i find that i'm actually discovering myself.
Being Master's pet is as much a part of me as anything else is, even moreso in the case of things like my anxieties. i don't think i could live a truly happy life without the knowledge that i'm a simple pet. i'm really quite pleased that all this has worked out so different than the way i thought it was going to.
- Lilikka
- My name is Lilikka. I'm a succubus with an incubus for a Master. I love to game and write, so that's what I do most often in my free-time.
Subscribe
Posts
Comments
3 comments:
This posting had me smiling in quiet recognition of the feelings within it. When Master and I started out, I too went through the same concerns about whether in surrendering to him, giving myself as deeply as he (we) wanted me to, that I end up somehow losing myself. What you say here is true for me too, the very opposite happened. I discovered parts of me which had always been there but had never been brought to the fore...could never have been without the relationship we have. So, far from losing myself, I actually 'found' myself. Sounds like you have too.
love and hugs xxx
You are growing every day, sweet girl! Yes, indeed, you are growing toward your Master, not losing a thing. But rather gaining ever so much more!
Big hugs!
It's wonderful that there are others who have discovered the same as i have. Thank you for sharing that, M:e
And thank you for your kind words, Tiggs. i know it often takes me a while to respond, but i appreciate the comments.
Post a Comment